The Odyssey of the

KEYSTONE COP PATROL

CAPTAINS BELL

 

Now please bear with me and you shall see

My rendition of a Keystone Cop tradition.

 

Twas the 18th of December and all was going well

For I was about to receive the coveted Captains Bell.

 

As Gary was talking there was nary a sound

Unbeknown to him there was a bell thief around

 

Santa was gone but Rudolph was busy

She moved so fast it made me dizzy

 

From around the corner a tiny hand did so quickly appear

And off the mantel, the Captains bell did disappear.

 

As tradition would have it, to the delight of many,

The bell was gone, the smiles were aplenty

 

The person who snatched it has their work cut out

Treat that bell right and show it the sights

 

Will it travel to Arizona, the Delta or Foresthill?

If that is so, dont give the Cops a shipping bill.

 

Are its travels to be recorded by picture or verse?

If that is true, hopefully I will hear of it first.

 

Al Swanson did a great job but one thing he did miss

Some say you are still Captain until properly dismissed.

 

Gary looked bewildered, confused and quite appalled.

John is your Captain, I saw him installed!!!

 

If I wasnt dismissed then neither was Roy

What a mess the Cops are in, Oh my God, boy-o-boy

 

John said he didnt have it so he couldnt have lost it

But give him some clues and his posse will find it.

 

John said he is not complete, he needs that damn bell,

Where in the world is it, probably halfway to hell.

 

By John V. Timblin III, Captain 2004